Sunday, September 14, 2014

Jokes for Sunday 14th September 2014

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SydesJokes Facebook Page Posts

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I'm not rude

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No matter how you feel

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Smile when you're sad

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There comes a point in your life

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There is something beautiful in everyday

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Joke # 1

Cut down trees




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Joke # 2

The factory of the future will have two employees, a man and a dog. The man will be there to feed the dog and the dog will be there to keep the man from touching the computers.

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Joke # 3

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer. Mother came home unexpectedly one evening, and she was shocked to find her daughter in a compromising position with the neighbor's son. "Why - I never she gasped.

The lad rolled over. "Oh, you must have... once!"

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Joke # 4

Q: Why did the cow jump over the moon?
A: Because the farmer had cold hands.

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Joke # 5

A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a nuisance, acting like a hotdog, flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber.

The hotdog said over the air, "Anything you can do, I can do better."

The veteran bomber pilot answered, "Try this hot-shot." The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level.

Perplexed, the hotdog asked, "So? What did you do?"

"I just shut down two engines, kid."

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Joke # 6

A guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug".

She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss".

She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."

Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich".

She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it.".

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Joke # 7

The marriage of an 80-year-old man and a 20-year-old woman was the talk of the town. After being married a year, the couple went to the hospital for the birth of their first child. The attending nurse came out of the delivery room to congratulate the old gentleman and said, 'This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?'

The old man grinned and said, 'You got to keep the old motor running.'

The following year, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their second child. The same nurse was attending the delivery and again went out to congratulate the old gentleman. She said, 'Sir, you are something else; How do you manage it?'

The old man grinned and said, 'You gotta keep the old motor running.'

A year later, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their third child. The same nurse was there for this birth also and, after the delivery, she once again approached the old gentleman, smiled, and said, 'Well, you surely are something else! How do you do it?

'The old man replied, 'It's like I've told you before, you gotta keep the old motor running.'

The nurse, still smiling, patted him on the back and said: 'Well, I guess it's time to change the oil. This one's black!'

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Joke # 8

Q: How do you make a tissue dance?
A: Put a little boogie in it.

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SydesJokes Blog Posts

Try Anal

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2012/01/try-anal.html

Renewable Energy

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2012/01/renewable-energy.html

Voting Republican

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2012/01/voting-republican.html

7 Billion People

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2012/01/7-billion-people.html

50/50 Chance

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2012/01/5050-chance.html

More funny posts --> http://bit.ly/h97b22

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SydesJokes Video Clips

Ted the Iceman Jackson

http://bit.ly/cG6UP0

Caught in the Act

http://bit.ly/9cc666

Glow in the Dark Condoms

http://bit.ly/dBCFb2

The Reason for Cold Beer

http://bit.ly/aYERji

Bowling Trick

http://bit.ly/b7nM1l


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