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Friday, March 6, 2015

Jokes for Thursday 26th February 2015

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SydesJokes Facebook Page Posts

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Joke # 1

Napoleon Hill Quote




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Joke # 2

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? No, they eat the fingers separately...

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Joke # 3

Two girls are sitting in a movie-theater. "That man beside me is fumbling his crotch", one whispers to the other. "Just ignore it", is the answer.

Easy for you to say. He's using my hand!.

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Joke # 4

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

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Joke # 5

A mugger wearing a ski mask jumps into the path of a well-dressed man and sticks a gun in his ribs.

Give me your money.

You can't do this to me! I'm a United States Congressman!

In that case ... give me MY money.

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Joke # 6

Mom, why does the dog drink out of the toilet? a son asked one afternoon.

Because the water is cool and refreshing, the mom answered.

Later, the boy went over to his friend's house. A dog resided there as well. They saw him go into the bathroom and drink out of the toilet.

My mom says a dog will drink out of the toilet because the water in there is cool and refreshing, the boy said.

His friend thought for a moment, then commented, "Wait, how does she know that?"

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Joke # 7

In a biology class the teacher asks, "Can anyone tell me why a flounder is flat?"

Little Johnny raises his hand.

Go ahead, Johnny.

My uncle told me it's because a whale raped the flounder.

That's terrible, Johnny. I'll have to speak to your parents about this. Let's try another one. Why does a lobster's eyes protrude fromits head?

Again Johnny raises his hand.

We'll give you another chance.

My uncle said when the whale raped the flounder, the lobster saw it, and his eyes popped out in shock.

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Joke # 8

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

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SydesJokes Blog Posts

Marriage Counselor

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2011/01/marriage-counselor.html

Arizona Shooting

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2011/01/arizona-shooting.html

The Redneck

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2011/01/redneck.html

Australian Tourism Slogans

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2011/01/australian-tourism-slogans.html

Looks Like a Penis Only Smaller

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2011/01/looks-like-penis-only-smaller.html

More funny posts --> http://bit.ly/h97b22

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SydesJokes Video Clips

Carlsberg Sports Drink

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Pen Holder

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USB Wine

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Curahee

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Candid Camera Russian Style

http://bit.ly/biyMvk


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