Monday, March 30, 2015

Jokes for Wednesday 25th March 2015

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SydesJokes Facebook Page Posts

Please Like the posts and leave your comments.

Your iPhone 5 arrived

http://on.fb.me/12HVE52

Pro-gas-ti-na-tion

http://on.fb.me/12HVE5b

Adulthood

http://on.fb.me/12HVJWo

Arrogant Bastard Beer

http://on.fb.me/12HVH0L

Bacon

http://on.fb.me/12HVHhb

Check more on Facebook --> http://SydesJokes.com/Facebook

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Joke # 1

Just sit




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Joke # 2

Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

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Joke # 3

A novice gardener who was looking for some advice asked an experienced farmer, "What would be good to plant in an area that gets very little rain, has too much late afternoon sun, has clay soil and lies on a rocky ledge?"

Replied the farmer, "How about a flagpole?"

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Joke # 4

Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: No-Eye Deer. (sound like No Idea)

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Joke # 5

A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in the house?!"

Several men stood up as the lights came on.

An older lady pulled her daughter to stand next to her, "Good, are any of you doctors single and interested in a date with a nice, Jewish girl?"

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Joke # 6

When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it.

The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate.

When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards."

He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh ... the Sixth ... the Fifth ..."

Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing."

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Joke # 7

A beautiful young blonde woman boards a plane to LA with a ticket for the coach section. She looks at the seats in coach and then looks ahead to the first class seats. Seeing that the first class seats appear to be much larger and more comfortable, she moves forward to the last empty one. The flight attendant checks her ticket and tells the woman that her seat is in coach. The blonde replies, "I'm young, blonde and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."

Flustered, the flight attendant goes to the cockpit and informs the captain of the blonde problem. The captain goes back and tells the woman that her assigned seat is in coach.

Again, the blonde replies, "I'm young, blonde and beautiful, and I'm going to sit here all the way to LA."

The captain doesn't want to cause a commotion, and so returns to the cockpit to discuss the blonde with the co-pilot. The co-pilot says that he has a blonde girlfriend, and that he can take care of the problem. He then goes back and briefly whispers something into the blonde's ear.

She immediately gets up, says, "Thank you so much," hugs the co-pilot, and rushes back to her seat in the coach section. The pilot and flight attendant, who were watching with rapt attention, together ask the co-pilot what he had said to the woman.

He replies, "I just told her that the first class section isn't going to LA."

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Joke # 8

Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
A: Still no eye deer.

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SydesJokes Blog Posts

Click on the ball and it will change colour

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2010/05/click-on-ball-and-it-will-change-colour.html

Murphy's Laws of Combat

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2010/05/murphys-laws-of-combat.html

Gulf Oil Spill Solution

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2010/05/gulf-oil-spill-solution.html

Connecting Past and Present

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2010/05/connecting-past-and-present.html

The Bum

http://sydesjokes.blogspot.com/2010/05/bum.html

More funny posts --> http://bit.ly/h97b22

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SydesJokes Video Clips

Bubblicious Gum

http://bit.ly/bWtQEx

Gay Song

http://bit.ly/bpAJ6l

Railway Crossing

http://bit.ly/9nzi80

London Dungeon

http://bit.ly/9OL5fS

ADSL Advert

http://bit.ly/9tkR20


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