Saturday, October 21, 2017

Daily Jokes from SydesJokes for 21 Oct 2017

 

Joke 1

One of the happiest moments in life

SydesJokes Blog

Original post: http://csyd.es/1/83


Joke 2

He who hesitates is probably right.


Joke 3

The personnel office received an email requesting a listing of the department staff broken down by age and sex.

The personnel office sent this reply...

Attached is a list of our staff. We currently have no one broken down by age or sex. However, we have a few alcoholics.


Joke 4

Q: How do locomotives hear?
A: Through the engineers.


Joke 5

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30 a.m., the stores opening time, in front of the store.

A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and complaints. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and the thrown to the end of the line again.

As he got up the second time, he said the person at the end of the line,

That does it. If they hit me one more time, I'm not opening the store.


Joke 6

Scott was working at a lumberyard pushing a tree through a saw when he accidentally shears off all four of his fingers.

He rushed to the emergency room of a nearby hospital where the doctor took a look and said, "Yuck! Well, give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do."

I haven't got the fingers. Scott replied.

The doctor said, "What do you mean, you haven't got the fingers? This is the age of medical advances. We've got microsurgery and all sorts of incredible techniques! Why didn't you bring me the fingers?"

Well, heck, doctor. I tried, but I couldn't pick 'em up.


Joke 7

A guy walking in the desert desperately needed a drink. As he followed the dunes, he came upon another man riding a camel. He asked the man if he had something to drink.

The man on the camel said "No, but if you like, I have a nice selection of ties. Would you like to buy one?"

No! The first man replied. "Are you crazy? I need something to drink, not a tie!"

So the man on the camel rode on, and the walking man continued his slow and very thirsty trek for several days. Finally he came upon a cantina.

He gratefully approached the doorman at the cantina and said, "I'm so glad I made it! Can I get in and get some water?"

The doorman frowned at him. "Not without a tie."


Joke 8

Q: Why is tennis such a loud game?
A: Because each player raises a racquet.


If you bought $100 of bitcoin 7 years ago

Original post: http://csyd.es/1/635


 

 

 

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