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Saturday, March 3, 2018

Daily Jokes from SydesJokes for 3 Mar 2018

 

Joke 1

Character and Reputation

SydesJokes Blog

Original post: http://bit.ly/2Gb3OrT


Joke 2

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.


Joke 3

A man has to leave the country on business and he entrusts with his best friend the job of keeping an eye on his wife. He instructed if anything out of the ordinary should occur, he was to be notified immediately.

After about a week of no news the businessman received a telegram: "The man who comes to visit your wife every night didn't show up yesterday..."


Joke 4

Q: How do men exercise on the beach?
A: By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.


Joke 5

An old Jewish beggar was out on the street, begging with his tin cup. A man passed by and the beggar said to him, "Sir, could you spare 8 cents for a cup of coffee?"

The man asked, "Where can you get coffee for 8 cents?"

"Who buys retail?" replied the beggar.


Joke 6

A fellow took his girlfriend, Bitzi, a natural blonde, to the movies. During the previews, she asked him if he would go and buy her some M&Ms.

When he returned with her candy, she opened the bag, picked out all the brown ones and threw them away.

"What did you do that for?" he asked her.

"I'm allergic to chocolate!" she replied.


Joke 7

A man walked into a Wal-Mart and the Greeter said, "Automotive, aisle 15."

The man asked, "How did you know I was here to get oil?"

The Greeter replied, "That's my job."

Another man walked in and the Greeter said, "Sporting goods, aisle 28."

The man asked, "How did you know I wanted fishing supplies?

The Greeter replied, "That's my job."

A woman walked in and the Greeter said, "Tampons, aisle 5."

The woman said, "No, I'm here for hemorrhoid medicine."

The Greeter said, "Darn, I missed it by an inch!"


Joke 8

Q: What did the rug say to the floor?
A: Don't move, I've got you covered.


Always drink upstream from the herd

SydesJokes Blog

Original post: http://bit.ly/2GaLjDJ


 

 

 

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