Joke 1
There is a difference
Original post: http://csyd.es/1/80
Joke 2
It's best not to show up naked at your girlfriend's house until at least the third date.
Joke 3
The passenger's reservation showed his name as "Cole, Pheven."
The ticket clerk said, "I'd like to be certain our information is correct. What is your first name?"
It's Stephen. I hope the reservation agent got it right. I told him it's spelled with a ph.
Joke 4
Q: What is at the end of everything?
A: The letter G.
Joke 5
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking.
'I got a cook book once', said the first, 'but I could never do anything with it.'
'Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?' asked the second.
You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way - 'Take a clean dish and ...'
Joke 6
Donald MacDonald from Scotland went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there a month, his mother came to visit him (no doubt carrying reinforcements of tatties, salt herring, oatmeal and whisky).
And how do you find the English students, Donald? she asked.
Mother, he replied, "they're such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and won't stop. The one on the other side screams and screams all night."
Oh Donald! How do you manage to put up with these awful noisy English neighbors?
Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here quietly, playing my bagpipes.
Joke 7
This British explorer is in the dark jungle, going where no Western man has gone before. Accompanying him is his trusted guide, interpreter, cook, and troubleshooter in one. One day early in the morning, they arrive at a lake and find a handsome dark young man engaged in "playful activities" with ten beautiful, dark, young women, all in the nude. The young man had the biggest, strongest male unit the Britisher had ever seen, or even imagined. He was simply awed. He asked his guide who this man was.
"He is the prince of the tribe that lives on the other side of the lake, Sir," came the reply. "This is his morning ritual."
"Ask him," the awed Brit said to his companion, "How did his member get to be this size?"
The guide goes to the lake and talks to the man, who seems to get very agitated by the conversation.
"Well, what did he say?" asked our hero to his assistant on his return.
"He said, 'There's nothing wrong with my penis. Doesn't the white man's shrink in cold water?'"
Joke 8
Q: What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
A: Fingernails.
Having a soft heart in a cruel world
Original post: http://csyd.es/1/79
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