Joke 1
There is no second chance for a first impression. - Oscar Wilde
Joke 2
Patience
Original post: http://bit.ly/2Gbgqzh
Joke 3
Physics instructor to class: "What are the two types of light?"
Student: "Uh, Bud and Miller?"
Joke 4
Q: Why did the spy stay in bed?
A: Because he was under cover.
Joke 5
When a new child visited our Sunday school, the Teacher greeted him and asked his age. The little Boy held up four fingers.
"Oh, you're 4," said the teacher. "And when will You be 5?"
The child stared at her and after a few seconds Replied, "When I hold up the other finger."
Joke 6
A stunning blonde had gone to her student advisor for some course problems, but seemed to be paying only half attention to his replies. "Are you feeling OK?" he asked.
"Well, to be honest, I have this compulsion to have sex with every man I meet," she admitted. "Is there a name for my condition?"
"Why yes, there is," he said, as he picked her up and began carrying her to the couch.
"It's called 'Good News'."
Joke 7
The female dentist pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot of Novocain. "No way! No needles. I hate needles" the patient said.
The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects. "I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on, suffocates me!"
The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill. "No objection," the patient says. "'I'm fine with pills."
The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra."
The patient says, "Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!"
"It doesn't" said the dentist, "but it's going to give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth!"
Joke 8
Q: What did the clock do after it ate?
A: It went back four seconds!
Thomas Jefferson
Original post: http://bit.ly/2GbZ9pg
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