Monday, January 15, 2018

Daily Jokes from SydesJokes for 15 Jan 2018

 

Joke 1

Fun Fact

SydesJokes Blog

Original post: http://csyd.es/1/581


Joke 2

To boost the British economy, I believe in taxing all foreigners living abroad. - Graham Chapman, Monty Python


Joke 3

Jimmy Jr. came home with great excitement, saying, "Dad! Dad! Coming back from the mall, I ran home behind the bus all the way and saved the eighty-five cent fare."

Jimmy Sr. chided him, and shouted, "Spendthrift! Why didn't you run behind a cab and save $5.00?"


Joke 4

Q: Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?
A: He decided to stick it out for one more year!


Joke 5

Jill: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.

Mary: TELL me about it! I went golfing with my husband one time, and he told me I asked too many questions!

Jill: Well, I'm sure you were just trying to understand the game. What questions did you ask?

Mary: I thought I asked legitimate questions . . . like, "Why did you hit the ball into that lake?"


Joke 6

The warden, turning to the first man, solemnly asked, "Son, do you have a last request?"

To which the man replied, "Yes sir, I do. I love dance music. Could you please play the Macarena for me one last time?"

Certainly, replied the warden.

He turned to the other man and asked, "Well, what about you, son? What is your final request?"

Please, said the condemned man, "kill me first."


Joke 7

An Amish boy and his father were in a mall

They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, "What is this, Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button.

The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out. The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son.....

Go get your Mother.


Joke 8

Q: Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
A: He's all right now.


A sincere apology

SydesJokes Blog

Original post: http://csyd.es/1/579


 

 

 

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